Laredo

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Deuce Hultzen - the Good, the Bad and the Ugly

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THE UGLY

On Intentional Talk, they bring up Matt Harvey.  Who hasn't pitched in year-and-a-half, of course.  Rose axs, "What's a successful year for him?!"  Millar goes, "32 starts.  If he gets 34, that's awesomeness.  Let's just get to 32."

:: blinks ::  Why isn't he shooting for 2016 or 2017?  Do I hear 2018, just to be conservative?

Ah, you say, but Hultzen had a shoulder.  Okay, let's tick off those precedents, starting with Erikkkk, Chris Carpenter, Gil Meche, and the other 9,000 of them.

It's a funny thing.  You would never see this in football, where everybody pro and amateur just totally spaces out that precedents have occurred.  "Let's see, Marshawn ran for 2 yards on the opening play.  2nd-and-8.  What's the correct play here?  Hmmmm.... (X-Y)2 * 16 / pi = obviously the proper decision here is a power sweep.

Wait.  ... ? has 2nd-and-8 been played before?"   [Dr. D rolls eyes, hands over 2-8 tendency chart]

When somebody tells you that Danny Hultzen needs to aim for 2016 "because he's been off a year," know that they are grovelling in ignorance.  We mean it in a good way.

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Something was different about Hultzen's delivery, "different" in the Japanese sense.  "Different" as a euphemism for "retarded."  What was it?

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Who or What is a Roenis Elias?

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Wish we could help yer on Roenis Elias, boys.  Trouble is, you're really supposed to watch somebody pitch first.  ... :- /  But since he's, um, in the Seattle Mariners rotation whilst simultaneously being nothing but a rumor, we better give you whatever we gots.

Dr. D could find one (1) glimpse of him on YouTube, that being about 4 pitches two years ago ... in a 21-10 loss.  HEH!  ... the video made no sense at all, because Roenis was coming down by Laredo, sidearm - while keeping the ball high in the zone.  (His delivery alone tells you that we are not exactly talking Javier Lopez or Sid Fernandez here.)

That does not jell with the fact that he is a groundball pitcher, as Jim pointed out exactly one year ago.

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Loch Ness Sea Monsters, Interdimensional Yeti and Groundballing Southpaws

A groundballing lefty?  Sound a little funky to start with?  It is.  Start with the understanding that the league average is 1.1 ground balls per fly ball:

Fizzlers

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Randy Wolf

As you know, his poor outing on Friday is not relevant.  What is relevant, is that he is pure "smoke and mirrors," and has been for five years.

We could say, "What in the world is the point."  Zduriencik could respond, "Hey, loyalty means a lot in this business.  Just ask my old pals in the saber department..."  And Jason Churchill could respond, "Nothing wrong with an old innings eater riding the bus for you in Tacoma, if he's willing to do it."

Here is our (too-) impassioned plea to keep Wolf far, far away from the Seattle Mariners' bullpen.  Objectively speaking, Wolf provides you a first-aid kit if your rotation starts hemorrhaging ... Subjectively speaking, he causes Dr. D to think back on every melancholy, "we're just here to avoid a forfeit" SP the 1976-1992 Seattle Mariners ever put on the mound.

We mean it in a good way.  And we mean it so's LrKrBoi29 can get ahold of the idea that SSI is not about hyping players.

;- )

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Hal’s Landing, Laredo

For a relaxed eating and drinking night out, check out Hal’s Landing at the border of Mexico in Laredo.  This restaurant and bar serves up tasty yet simple food to appease the appetite and offers some DJs and live music for those that stay a little later into the night.  If you’re looking to go someplace and just have a good time with no stress or worries, Hal’s Landing is a safe bet.  Take a date there so that you can get something to eat and then have a few drinks at the bar.

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