POTD Kevin Kouzmanoff - In Safeco
=== 2,000 Lbs. of Fire Ants, Dept. ===
If Kevin Kouzmanoff, a RH hitter, moves from Petco to Oakland to Safeco, he will have completed a Thousand Ants trifecta that boggles the mind.
Assuming Petco, Oakland and Safeco to be the three worst parks for Kevin Kouzmanoff to hit in (cut me some slack here, dudes), the odds against Kouzmanoff nailing exactly these parks in three attempts is 24,360 to one.
Hey, at least we don't have to amputate 50 points off the guy's SLG if he moves here. The surgery has already been performed.
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=== Calling Card ===
Here is Tango's wonderful Fan Report on Kouzmanoff's D, which is pretty well what keeps him in a job. Kouzmanoff's D, we mean, not Tango's fan report.
Kouz has a rep for racquetball-quick hands at third, and a reliable arm. D-metrics agree.
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We will point out that the current regime is way biased toward defense. Apologists for the ballclub are warmly invited to go count their 513 runs again.
We will point out that this means that Kevin Kouzmanoff's name would have legs around the Royal Brougham office.
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=== Dr's Prognosis, Dept. ===
Hopefully you amigos will forgive me a personal prejudice here. After 35 years of Bill Stein, I'm sick to the gut of him.
I find it depressing to watch the Mariners roll out baseball players that could have blended into the 1977 backdrop and never been picked out of a police-style lineup. I mean, I want to be past 1977.
Not that the M's will even obtain, or are even within shouting distance of, this tremendous victory: upgrading to a guy who played for the 1977 Mariners.
But y'understand. My feeling about Kouzmanoff is one thing. Objectively speaking, he's an average-mediocre ballplayer. A GM cannot draw up a Season Plan without including a few of those somewhere on the roster.
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=== Don't Quote Me ===
Kouzmanoff has just a little bit of potential upside:
- Was only 28 last year, had only 2400 at-bats
- At 25, was kind of a minor star
- Had an unlucky BABIP last year
- Has had flashes: 84% CT in first half last year, .280+ AVG in second half
- Always gives you tough AB's vs RHP
I wouldn't give you a dime for the upside. If Billy Beane trades him, it means that Billy wouldn't, either. But Kouz could have his best season in 2011. I'm not banking on it, but if Kouz were an M we'd be willin' to hope for it.