The least Interesting Man in the World
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"He once beat Garry Kasparov at chess. Using his left hand."
Dr. D just watched a reality show in which a lady with a $175,000 budget shopped for houses. She wanted three bedrooms, two places to take a bath, stainless appliances, granite in the kitchen, a sun room, a spacious back yard, and a bird sanctuary for her telepathic parrot, who had final say over the purchase.
The Mariners wanted a right hand Master Blaster who could beat most lefties with his breath, and he had to play center field. To which we can confidently say, "?!"
Their budget was limited to relief pitchers from Boston College. Incredibly, they pulled this transaction off, and secured a Mark McLemore-class benchie at no cost to anybody, except Gordon Gross. Dr. D's awe knows no bounds.
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"He sent his checking account information to an email from Nigeria, and actually got his $400,000."