Gallardo on 3.27.17
.
WE CAN STILL BE FRIENDS, Dept.
We watched the first 9 pitches, shut the TV off, and sat down to vent in this article. So there's all kinds of chance that the following could be off track.
....
AND --- > If you think Gallardo deserves a chance, and he gets nuked until he glows, it is ZERO reflection on your baseball judgment, fellow Denizen. During the season, we ain't going to gloat and we ain't going to rub it in. If the mushroom cloud occurs on schedule, that is. If Game 5 is blown to the Angels by 11-0, we'll probably just let the pitching pass without comment. It's at that point for me.
Seriously, we all get some of them wrong and some of them right. If Gallardo gives us some Quality Starts, I won't feel weird. Like, Brandon Maurer RP, Smoak, Ackley etc etc were bad calls on my part. Craig Wright said, this is an industry where if you get 60% right, you lead the field. Hopefully there will be counters in the comments even to this sordid hit piece. ;- ) If you are undeterred by today's box score, good on you!
Malcontent's article is sound, data-driven, and remains a valuable "Case For." Nothing against that guest post for sure. Keep it comin'.
....
Dr. D watched 2 hitters in a spring training game. Slop happens. If you want to retain hope here, just treat the below as a comedy article.
Okay, you've had your warning. Stretch and do a little cardio before you read an SSI hit piece. Or you'll pull something. The +3 -5 type voting on Gallardo is hereby suspended, unless you amigos want us to keep it going.
.
HOPE AGAINST HOPE, Dept.
Dr. D has savaged Yovani Gallardo beyond any possible sense of proportion this winter. Like an OSU student fearing a nation-wide declaration of martial law on Nov. 9, or like a Trumpie who was convinced Hillary was in her last 90 days of life, Dr. D has talked himself into an irrational sense of fear on this. Denizens chuckled and advised him to lie back in a dark room and breathe.
So he did. He turned on the MLB network game, and turned on the Mighty Mainframe Electron Microscope for some hint that Gallardo might have something in his top hat other than silk napkins. Could well be. We peered into the microscope ready to find signs of hope.
.
PITCH ONE
Zuumball set his mitt low and away, with a little jab-set, as if to say "right here buddy. Right here." Gallardo took a perfect motion, let a slowball fly, and --- > missed way up and inside. 2, 3 feet off.
.
PITCH TWO
Zuumball set his mitt low and away, less emphatically. Gallardo aimed carefully, let the slowball go, and missed perfect center-cut. Any random Astro and the 1-0 pitch would have gone 450 feet.
.
PITCH THREE
Zuumball set low-away. Gallardo aimed the ball, let it go, maybe 88, 89 MPH, and --- > missed stomach high, bisecting the plate. OH NOOOOooooo... the right hand hitter took a mighty swing and missed. Popup foul 1B.
Dr. D was unnerved. It is spring, yes, but these are BP fastballs and they are missing wildly. All three of them.
.
PITCH FOUR
LH Jankowski up. Gallardo throws another slowball that misses out and over the plate. Jankowski takes it. Trust me, if these 4 pitches occur in an Astro game, Gallardo's SLG allowed will be over .700. I said, >.700 SLG and I'll bet you hard cash it is 7xx+.
.
PITCH FIVE
Changeup!
Missed way, WAY outside; Zuumball had to reach a lot. But! Jankowski bought in and swung in front of it. This is a Gallardo Silk Napkin Out of the Top Hat; he tricked Jankowski. Good on him. Not that I want to stake my pennant on ML hitters swinging at changeups nowhere near the strike zone. But yeah.
This is a smoke-and-mirrors righty who will rely on command in the zone, is it not?
.
PITCH SIX
Zuumball sets his mitt, with the emphatic jab, for a LO-IN jam pitch.
Gallardo throws a slowball and it misses UP AND AWAY, perfect teeball for a tape-measure shot. .... at this point do you think Dr. D is embellishing this?!
Jankowski swings through it. See the Top Hat characterization. Gallardo specializes these days in catching hitters guessing wrong. Jankowski might have been guessing that Gallardo could throw a pitch someplace near the target. How wrong he was.
.
PITCH SEVEN
On 1-2, Zuumball sets his mitt -- up and right over the plate? Must want a yakker. Gallardo winds and throws --- > some kind of ladder slowball that is 1' at least over the zone. Jankowski takes easily. It's 2-2.
.
PITCH EIGHT HERE COMES A MAJOR LEAGUE PITCH!
On 2-2, Gallardo throws a low-away change to Jankowski and it misses only about 4-6 inches low. Good pitch! Good pitch! That is 1 out of 8 pitches that are not horrifying. Jankowski takes it. The ump hesitates, calls it low which it was, and the count is 2-2.
.
PITCH NINE
On 3-2, Zuumball sets his mitt for a ... challenge fastball?! Is he truly going to call for this pitch in LAA?
Gallardo aims carefully, lets the ball go, and --- > Zuumball almost has to leave his feet to catch it, high and away. Jankowski saunters down to 1B.
.
DR DETECTO, THOROUGHLY UNNERVED, TURNS OVER TO THE MARINERS WEBSITE
I never did watch anything but those 9 pitches, so take it with a grain of salt. Maybe Gallardo showed a promising curve or something? Let us know.
We expected zero but, after 9 pitches... that was wayyyyy worse than I thought possible. I paused the DVR and cue'd up the M's website, hoping to find a 4-3 game and Servais saying that Gallardo threw the ball well. Box score? 12-2 Padres and the headline "Gallardo roughed up." The only postgame quote was from Gallardo:
.
Gallardo said he felt strong in his 91-pitch outing and had just one takeaway on the day.
"Don't pitch when the wind is going out," Gallardo said with a smile. "I felt good, it was just one of those days."
.
FREE ANATACIDS
Have you noticed that the best EYE in the M's camp belongs to --- > Mike Zunino? He's young, a defense-first player, and has had very little chance to develop his pitch recognition. Shandler said UP: 30 hr.
.
Just write this off as a comedy piece,
Dr D