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The only differ'nce tween Rodney and Benoit being, so far as Dr. D can tell, is (1) a slider and (2) that it took Jack Zduriencik until Feb. 13th to decide on a wipeout relief pitcher for an $8M salary. Jerry DiPoto's decision came rather more decisively. You get a picture of Noah Bennett throwing elbows and knees to plow through a crowd at 15 MPH, save the cheerleader, and save the world. Left hand keeping a longslide 10MM half-hidden behind his hip, naturally.
One of Dr. D's earliest childhood memories, circa 1964, was of a blue-and-yellow soft plastic biplane he got for Christmas as a toddler. About that year he read Bill James admiring Earl Weaver and Whitey Herzog for being, direct quote, "smart and decisive." Let's stipulate that both Jerry and Jack are smart. But let's also remember Allll Those Times when Jack Z stepped up to the plate and then, Hargrove-like, created a Human Rain Delay adjusting his gloves to the pitch.
Nice to have Benoit in so QUICK. That's all I got to say about that.
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You remember our Rock-Paper-Scissors online game? By the time you play 200 rounds the computer will be saying stuff like "I played rock to your scissors because in 7 of the last 8 times you sequenced P-R-R-P-S and lost four of the five, you came back with scissors."
That's a little bit like the subconscious mind of a major league hitter, whether you're talking Bobby Wagner or Mike Trout. Therefore, the last Cy Young relief pitcher (I'm pretty sure) came up with a 33-33-33 plan in which he literally rolled dice to set pitches. If you rolled dice against the Rock-Paper-Scissors computer, you could draw also. And did you know that random number generators are illegal in NFL coaches' boxes?
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Benoit has maybe an even better dice protocol, that being a 40-20-40 prescription. ... well, last year it was 45-20-35, so sue me. The point is, you can extend the fingers of your right hand, draw an F on two of them, a CH on two of them, and a SL on one of them. It's a Zen arrangement.
Rodney threw a good 35% changeups, against his 65% fastballs, he would lead all of baseball -- absolutely #1 -- in Freeze Frame. The highest number of strikes taken. Joaquin Benoit's thang, similarly, is Swinging Strike Rate. Over the last two years combined, he is #3 in baseball with a 17.3% rate. There is Aroldis Chapman, Koji Uehara, and then him. Kelly Jansen, Andrew Miller, and Craig Kimbrel follow Benoit on the table.
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Hey, I've got some terrible news for you. Due to a high-powered negotiation, Dr. D's innings pitched are shortly going to double in terms of articles written. And his at-bats in the Shout Box are going to go up by a factor of ten. Obviously, you'll want to back your chairs another 8" away from the SSI monitor.
Serious question: can one of you amigos clue me in on how to use Twitter to funnel traffic over to our vaunted site? There is a fresh Tweet up this a.m. (@clarke_jeff) that tries to horn in on the Joaquin Benoit twitter-sphere. You know, so that somebody searching Benoit on Twitter would take a gander at baseball's best blog and Think Tank. What could I 'a done better on the hashtags and stuff?
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And sorry about the formatting, but the spirit is clear.
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DiPoto said, rat cheer,
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"A three-pitch, back-end guy with three out pitches at any given moment in time and that changeup just gives him a wipeout pitch to both sides," the new Seattle GM said. "He'll throw it to the right and the left. He's been both durable and ... a good fit for our ballpark."
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Tomorrow (or sometime) we'll mosh off a big DiPoto interview at Fangraphs. Now, Dr. D does not want you guys to take this the wrong way, but. When Jerry DiPoto talks he reminds me of somebody.
Know who dat is?
That fictional Dr. Detecto literary character.
... well, Dr. D idealized, anyway. It's a little bit like saying LeBron James' game is very similar to my son John's basketball game. The "sure, if you're talking To Scale" part is a given. DiPoto talks just the way I would want to, if I were a GM:
- Having spent many many many MANY years reading saber shtick
- But speaking in terms of CF-camera visuals
- With an attempt to put the finger on the very few things that actually matter
- In a friendly, this-ain't-brain-surgery-this-is-for-fun tone
Well, it's probably just too much imagination and too much birthday cake doing a slow roll in the tummy. Point is, Jerry DiPoto is off to a real good start by one 'net rat, at least.
BABVA,
jemanji
