=== Early Match ===

Cesc Fabregas, with relaxed shoulders and an air as if he were facing an U-18 team, stood over the kickoff and rolled it back to a defender to start play.

For the next five minutes, the Gunners leisurely rolled the ball around hapless Wolverhampton midfielders as the Wolves turned their backs and ran 11 men into the penalty box, desperately hoping to lose only 1-0.

Fifteen minutes in, Spanish superstar Cesc Fabregas used his weak foot to chip a ball into Dutch superstar Robin van Persie, who used his own weak foot to rifle a goal into the back of the net.

Arsenal having absolutely no "psychological fallout" whatsoever from the Newcastle game -- zero, zip, nada; in fact they were playing with serene joy -- the announcers carefully avoided the subject of psychological fallout for the rest of the game.

If you fail we'll discuss your grade after school; if you get an "A" let's talk about something else.  

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=== Carry On, Lads ===

The Gunners' second goal came on a patented one-touch long pass from Cesc the Fabulous to a streaking Theo Walcott.  Theo generously rolled the ball over to van Persie on a 2-on-1 fast break, and van Persie bemusedly knocked the ball past Wolves' keeper.

............

Long story short:  One of the all-time great 'keeping performances kept the Wolves into a 2-0 defeat rather than a 5-0 defeat.

Wolves boss Mick McCarthy did one better:  "If it wasn't for [our goalkeeper] I could have sat here thinking it was 6, 7, or 8."

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=== Shot for a Wolf, Hung for a Lamb ===

Wolves achieve their every ambition for the game:  they go home losers, able to say that the scoreboard looked okay.

There are some things about English football that I will never understand. 

To me, the Wolves' attitude entering the game was truly, deeply humiliating.  In America we would simply never stand for a team walking onto the field having acknowledged defeat, with the objective of keeping the score within 20 points or whatever.

It's not like the Wolves were attempting a 0-0 draw.  They were attempting a 1-0, 2-0 loss.  The announcer, in the first few minutes, stated precisely that:  "this will be an exercise in damage limitation" for the Wolves.  This right after the Wolves beat Manchester United!

I don't get it:  you can only be given one loss for one match.  Why not attempt to win?  You may as well be shot for a wolf as hung for a lamb.

But then, I've never sat in a pub during the week and chatted football.  The psychology is opaque to me.  Perhaps one of our EPL friends will educate me as to why the Wolves' "exercise in damage limitation" attitude is acceptable.

..............

At any rate, one man's serenity is another man's agitation:  "There was murder going on out there, and we were the recipients of it," lamented Mick McCarthy.  Here's rooting for the #17 slot.  A lot of top scalps yer got there, mate.

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