M's 6, Royals 4
Cano and Cruz will be pleased with the adulation toDAY

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The Mainframe has grokked an amazing thing.  Are you sitting down?  

It has found that a baseball fan's subconscious mind is affected by the world into which he was born.  American schizophrenics hear voices that are dark, scary, and threatening.  Kenyans hear voices that are playful and innocent (yes, really).  In related news, Mariners fans believe that Ketel Marte will hit .191 this year, that Dae-Ho Lee has three weeks to "live" (in MLB lingo) and that James Paxton is a mental "midget."  

Dr. D can blame the fans for none of this.  We do not choose the voices in our heads.  Hot mustard vs sweet 'n sour, that we choose.  Our compulsions to throw ourselves off Safeco railings, not so much.

Which is why Dr. D often comes off as so absolute in his principles.  He doesn't have to compromise his beliefs, because none of them have the slightest bearing on him anyway.

....

He believed that James Paxton should, at worst, be used as the M's 2016 Matt Thornton out of the 'pen.  But this was before Paxton demonstrated, to everyone's satisfaction, that he is not ready to execute his own pitches.  

After those last two outings, Dr. D would have sent K-Pax down too.  He needs a rhythm back.  Also, Merrill's point about innings buildup is accurate.  ... not that any of it will have the slightest bearing on Paxton's future anyway ... 

Randy Johnson had thrown 750 completely maddening major league innings -- that's 750 IP in the AL, pal -- before he stumbled onto the fix to his mechanics (as opposed to stumbling on things that made him a better human being and therefore ready for baseball competition).  

Are there other power lefties who wandered in the strike zone wilderness until they were 25, or 28, or 30?  About half of them.

....

Nate Karns celebrated the disastrous Paxton news by throwing 50 strikes and 13 balls.  The Royals, against all odds, earned 2 runs against him in 6 IP, which shows you just how blinkin' good they really are.  (Infield errors and 45-MPH thumb-shot RBI's scored another 2 runs against him.)

Karns throws those same pitches from April to September, he's going to be our 16-win answer to Keuchel and McHugh.

That is, ONE of our 16-win answers BWAYAHAHAHYAH 

.

As our old pal TopCat would have put it ...
As our old pal TopCat would have put it ...

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....

BASEBALL DORKING.  Nelson Cruz got a 1-2 pitch up .... Hm.  You know the little shock wave the CGI shows when Superman re-enters to save Lois?  They do a great job with "boom" CGI.  How come we can't get boom CGI on Cruz' fly balls? 

The ball sailed over the outfield, over the fans, took one bounce off the cement sidewalk behind the fans and cleared the 15-foot high canopy up on the hill (!).  But that was not the dorking.  The dorking was that you could literally see the deepest fans out there, little ants with their backs to the camera, peering to watch the ball roll away in the parking lot.

Next ups, Cruz was fooled on a curve away, broke his bat and lined the ball into CF.  Extreme PWR and very next at-bat, extreme HIT.  You tell me this game WASN'T dorkable.  

....

Robinson Cano was better today than he was yesterday, when he hit 3 homers.  Watching him take a pitch and then bob around in the batter's box, watching his "brightness" physically ... last year's Cano looks, in retrospect, like he was on a Thorazine drip all year.

:: he stops short :: How do we know he wasn't?  What meds was he taking?

The over-under on his OPS+ this year is 145.  B'lee DAT.  This version of Robinson Cano is flat out money in the bank.  Speaking of?  There is a blinkin' reason he scored $200M and it is sweet to see that reason.

....

Vidal Nuno came in and pitched ahead of batters.  In other news, water is wet, grass is green and Felix can throw his curve for strikes. With all the gambles that DiPoto is taking in the bullpen, Nuno is as responsible as a Blow 'n Go.

Nathan Karns followed by Benoit, Nuno and Peralta in a tie game - this would feasibly have been the pitching in the middle game of the home opener.  Guess they're in the last week.

....

Leonys Martin only struck out swinging twice today.  Yeah baby.

Pro: there isn't much harm the Ks did us that two popups wouldn't have.  Con: he still hasn't gotten the Sam Horn of Plenty (four+ strikeouts in a single evening) out of the way before Opening Week.

Dan Robertson stayed after O'Malley went.  Dr. D wonders idly whether Robertson plays a decent center field.

BABVA,

Jeff

Blog: 

Comments

1

This KKKKARNIVORE character is meriting words numbering in the six figures at least.  I think the Mariners are going to be in as good of shape as SSI has seen. 

The Firstros are starting to worry me.  They traded young journeyman Orc Dan Straily today, because he wasn't good enough to be one of their backup pitchers.  BABVA.

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